MELLIPOP AND THE BARRICADE

Ok, so Anton and I have recently tried various methods to keep the demon dogs from completely destroying the house. The key has been to keep them restricted to the tiled living room area, which is a stategic compromise between my hardline willingness to leave them locked outside all day (oh, the horror!) and soft-cock Anton’s desire to allow them interior access to escape the elements.

1. THE ELECTRIC FENCE

So we rigged up an electric fence inside the house last weekend. Poor little Tonka got mega-zapped, the inevitable and unfortunate result of his juvenile curiosity. His slightly more intelligent older sister was more than happy to avoid the fence at all costs having simply witnessed the painful result of her younger siblings’ encounter with the electrified barrier.

Unfortunately the electric fence did not even stay up long enough for me to get a picture. Little Tonka, in his stupid stubborn persistence, decided that he would try to get AROUND the barricade rather than THROUGH it, as he did on his first unsuccessful attempt.

So as Tonka was trying to get around the fence, the wires touched and started sparking. Now I’m no electrician, but the thought of leaving a sparking electric fence unsupervised inside the house with two Staffies for 10 hours every day did not leave me with any great feeling of reassurance. I finally convinced Anton that in attempting to “save” the house, it was probably best not to risk burning it down. Lino we can feasibly replace without getting busted - or incurring inordinate expense. Rebuilding the house, not so feasible. And somewhat more expensive.

So that was a costly $300 failure, the components of the electric fence being entirely non-refundable.

2. THE CHICKEN WIRE BARRICADE

This was the next step. Anton created a barricade using chicken wire. We stepped out of the house for two hours, only to come back and find that the dogs had eaten through the wire barricade. They both looked fairly pleased with themselves.

Back to the drawing board.

3. THE WOODEN BARRICADE – VERSION 1.0

So Anton then used the frame from the chicken wire barricade to construct a wooden barricade.
Not so successful either. Comanche somehow managed to jump through the gap at the top, where we ran out of wood. She then helped her little brother Tonka escape by pushing the barricade forward so he could get into the kitchen. He then ripped up another huge section of vinyl just to say “Fuck you”.

4. THE WOODEN BARRICADE – VERSION 2.0

So Anton and I then hit Bunnings to get more wood, so we could shore up the barricade and increase its height. This worked. Sort of. The dogs are not able to jump it anymore - and are hence unable to rip up the lino on the kitchen floor - but instead, now spend their days systematically ripping up the couch just to say “Fuck you”.

Note that the couch cushions have already been removed during the day, to stop the dogs eating them too.

You might also like to note that Tonka seems quite keen to pose defiantly with the various results of his daily destruction. That little fucker.