LETTUCE A'LA MELLIPOP
Ok, so it’s hard to really be bothered preparing meals when you’re on your own. Last night’s dinner was half a rockmelon, a nectarine and some yoghurt. Tonight’s fare is even more painfully austere, even by my notably lazy standards.
So I’m sitting here eating a bag full of “gourmet” lettuce leaves for dinner because I can’t be arsed chopping up a couple of tomatoes and a spanish onion and throwing it all into a bowl with some balsamic vinegar and cracked pepper.
The worst thing is, the lettuce leaves are GRITTY. That pisses me off. Now the thing is, if I’m paying $17.99 a kilo for what amounts to a handful of glorified grass, I at least expect it to be freakin’ WASHED. In today’s fast-paced world I simply don’t have the time to clean my own lettuce. What it comes down to is that I shouldn’t have to shell out $17.99 a freakin’ kilo for leaves with the dirt still attached – I’m paying premium price for some other sucker to provide that service for me, by God!
Aaah…Fuck it. I’m sure there’s vital nutrients in all that dirt anyway. I just have to try not to retch….
posted by Mel @ 8:16 PM
3 Comments:
Ha ha what a fabulous and enlightening tutorial!!!
Now you sound like a girl who knows a lot about many the different varieties of grass on offer in God's Kitchen ...:)
I will have to look in to exporting from NSW. I think you're on to something there! Though I'm a bit worried about the "wilt" factor... ;)
Yeah ... I wonder if Mellipop's started guilt tripping Anton for the move to WA. I'd be worried if she has ... since *she* was the one who dragged his skinny arse there after 6 months of turning up the heat to the point where it was "move or lose me" ! :) But I digress.
What you *need* to do to solve your lettuce problem m'dear, is f*ck making your own salads ... instead choose a readily-assembled variety from 'Mrs.Crocketts' range, available from the fruit and veg section of your local Coles in Freo. Or the equivalent 'Woolworths Fresh' item available, funnily enough, from Woolies.
Disappearing Boy often subsists on Mrs.Crocketts finest Ceasar Salad when he's feeling bloated / on a temporary health kick, and there are other varieties also available for the more adventerous pallate. The Caesar is really good (and you can always use it as a base for your own experiments ... for example I'm thinking of doing a Thai Chicken variety at some point soon), and at around $3.50 is a far cheaper alternative to your $17 overpriced Cos lettuce ...
Finding dirt is better than finding a dirty toe nail.
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