A CASE OF MISTAKEN IDENTITY
Ok, so I was at the record store today and, like most days, managed to make a right dick of myself.
A few nights ago, the Channel 7 current affairs program broadcast a five minute feature on a competition run by one of the local radio stations. A “Best Mullet” contest. So Anton and I watched with avid glee this freakish parade of fat-woman mullets, long-term prisoner mullets, ADD-kid mullets and your garden-variety bogan mullet. I mean, mullets are a dime a dozen in Fremantle, anyway. No biggie.
So I was at work today and the guy from the loading dock brought up a few boxes of stock that had arrived for the store. As soon as I saw him I did the classic double-take. Where had I seen that mullet before?
As soon as the penny dropped I went bounding across the shop floor, squealing “I saw you on TV the other night!”, loud enough for half of Fremantle to hear. I got a kind of quizzical look from Mullet Guy, and yet pushed on regardless. “Yeah – I saw you on Channel Seven. You won the ‘Best Mullet in Perth’ competition. I SAW you!”
Mullet Guy gave me a priceless look of utter confusion and slowly shook his head in response to my enthusiastic assertions, not sure if he should laugh or be pissed off. And no doubt wondering, "Who the fuck is this sheila, anyway?". And I’m still there insisting that it was DEFINITELY him that I saw. Like he somehow forgot entering and winning a Mullet competition that was also filmed by a camera crew from Channel 7.
All the while my colleagues were just laughing hysterically, and staring at me with the kind of stunned, “Oh my God, Mel WHAT were you thinking” looks that I have seen so many times before in my life. And then Mullet Guy joined in and they all laughed at me, while I stood there sheepish and blushing like buggery. Now Mullet Guy keeps winking at me whenever he walks past. We have a bond now, you see.
posted by Mel @ 10:24 PM
6 Comments:
Ah ha ha, that's so winceful.
- Nicholas
Christ Mel whats a mullet..your ever so ignorant Mum..
Good to see you worked out the comments thing. Welcome!
Now, a mullet is a type of hairstyle. Short on top but long at the back. Look at some of the old pics of Dad when he had long hair. That's a mullet. But these days, having a mullet is not a good look, hence they are easy to take the piss out of. Think your typical westie.
Or alternatively, have a look at Jason Gillespie from the Australian cricket team. THAT is a damn fine mullet.
Do you mind if I stand up for the mullet? I mean, it's the haircut of kings. Power, masculinity, a certain windswept beauty - it has them all. No other haircut emphasised the width of a man's (or woman's) shoulders so well.
William Wallace had a mullet, and that's how he defeated the English at the Battle of Stirling. Mel Gibson's Braveheart would have you believe otherwise, but doubt not that the great Scots were all well and truly mulleted. And let's face it: when the alternative is a crew cut or a retro Archie-style quiff, the classic mullet doesn't look too shabby at all.
Mark
[papertrap.net]
I've got three words for you Papertrap. Billy. Ray. Cyrus.
Lets not forget Mel's other classic mullet of Lethal Weapon fame. Therein lies a mullet which spawned four sequels. In fact, I'd like to posit the brave assertion that all the Lethal Weapon series films were solely ABOUT the mullet. Everything else - the clevely though out plots, Mel's & Danny Glover's cunning characterisations ... everything ... were all mere trimmings to support the true *star* of those darn movies ... Mel's mullet. Waddayathink ?
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